Mrs. Cheney's students write

It's autobiography season in Cheneyville. In an effort to get my students to write creative introductions, I banned the phrase "I am going to write . . ." and the word "autobiography" for this assignment. And so, of course, the first (that's right, FIRST) paper I read started:

"I am going to write an autobiography about myself."

And to remind you the difference one measly letter can make (italics added):

• "We were going to see the Arizona Diamondbacks vs. the Colorado Rookies."
• "Instead of hitting the log with the ax, I hit my hand. I cut my thump almost all the way off."
• "We were disappointed because the building was not open to the pubic."

I should hope not!